wellness – Page 2 – Peacewellbeing.co.uk

Dearest Richard,

June 8, 2022July 9, 2022 besspurser

Last weekend we should have been celebrating your 42nd birthday. We should have been having a garden party, dinner in a fine restaurant or drinks in a wine bar followed by dancing. You would have lit up the dance floor with your enthusiasm, exuberance and energy.

We still haven’t celebrated your 40th birthday, flights to Spain and lunch in a Michelin star restaurant cancelled, twice, because of covid. In your head, that means you’re still 39. In my head, you are forever preserved as young, vibrant and joyous. You were born two months before me and now I am older than you. You will not get old. You have been denied that privilege.

Your birthday will be marked with sadness, loss and heartache in perpetuity. At present, I cannot imagine a time when these feelings won’t dominate each anniversary that passes. Each thought I have of you.

And yet I smile too. I smile at the memories of the adventures we had together. Of the mischief we made, of being led astray by you, of the incitement of naughtiness between us. The most fun I’ve had in my life, you were there, leading the charge with your charm, cheek and ginormous heart.

You had a tremendous talent for making everyone around you feel included, special and beautiful. The light that emanated from you bounced off everyone you connected with. It was your reflection.

The fight to keep your spirit alive is a daily battle. Some days are easier than others. Some days, surrender is the only option. The only way through. Grief is an expression of love. To deny that enunciation, in whatever way it exposes itself, is to deny your existence. This, I have learnt from your beloved Henry. He travels through his grief without repudiation.

Henry is building a charitable foundation in your name. He is creating light, from the darkness of your death, and he is preserving, perpetuating and extending your light for the benefit of others. Your light loves on.

Le Petit Singe, the charitable foundation that Henry has set up, raises money to help those affected by sudden bereavement, heart conditions and international environmental and social issues that Richard was involved with. Please visit lepetitsinge.co.uk for more information and to make a donation.

Book Reviews

Book review – The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read… by Philippa Perry

April 7, 2022April 7, 2022 besspurser

This beautifully kind, wise and compassionate book has been a wonderful reminder of the parent I aspire to become. It goes without saying, of course, that I am not a perfect parent. Who is? The joy of this book is that it does not set out to achieve perfection (which would only set you up for failure), nor does it reprimand you for mistakes made in the past. It gently encourages you to explore your words, actions and the examples you set to your child, observing how they might affect your child(ren), how they affected you when you were a child and the possible long term effects on your relationship with your child.

It’s not about how many times you mess up, lose your rag and end up crying in a corner (with at least one child screaming on the floor at the same time). It’s about accepting that these things happen, putting actions in to place to minimise them (ie recognising your own limits and how to manage them), and ‘repairing the rupture’ by being compassionate with yourself and authentic in your restorative actions.

It has great examples and case studies of where parents have struggled with their child(ren), even to the point of wanting to leave the family unit, and offers tender, considerate and often humorous responses to the challenges we all face in our parenting (and indeed all) relationships in our lives.

It ties in perfectly with the La Leche League philosophy of ‘loving guidance’, which is one of the many reasons I kept going back to La Leche League. I knew I wanted to follow the gentle parenting path, I think even before I became pregnant, and it was demonstrated so admirably by the mums present at the meetings.

It reminded me that loving guidance is a long term investment (it also has short term benefits too), that patience is a virtue (no one has taught me more about being patient than my son), and that if you’re not looking back at your life and cringing at certain moments, you’re not learning and growing as a person, parent and human being.

Uncategorized

Open, closed, open, closed, open, closed. Opening soon?

March 11, 2021June 9, 2021 besspurser

Well my loves, are we coming out of our third and final lockdown? Is April 12th the date I can re-open for aromatherapy, Indian head massage and reflexology again? Will I have finished all the painting and decorating, spider evicting and deep cleaning?

I’m feeling optimistic and have already had enquiries about making appointments, so let’s open the diary and get you booked in! It is of course, subject to everything going according to the government’s plan, and we’ve already learnt that things can change overnight. So let’s get you pencilled in, with a caveat that it may have to change, at the last minute.

I will be continuing with the changes made between the lockdowns – ie limiting appointments to one hour, disinfecting, wearing masks, disinfecting, washing hands on entry, disinfecting, and errr, a bit more disinfecting. My washing machine will be groaning again! But I will be happy to be returning to one of my favourite jobs, catching up with you all and helping to soothe away all the stresses of the last year.

I hope that come the summer, we might not need to wear masks, and that I can offer longer appointments again. I’d also like to bring back my upholstered chairs as the wipe clean ones are embarrassingly squeaky. But this obviously all depends on the aforementioned government plan, and there are some actions that are best practice anyway, so I will be keeping them up (apologies once more to my washing machine!).

I’ll be contacting my existing clients over the next few weeks to see if they would like to book in again. There is absolutely no obligation to do so, if you would rather wait until further lockdown restrictions are lifted, that is absolutely fine and totally understandable. I can’t wait to welcome you back, whenever that may be.

And hugs. When can we start hugs again? How I’ve missed them!

Uncategorized

Indulging my (our) inner crazy, part two

November 7, 2019November 7, 2019 besspurser

I didn’t anticipate there’d be a part two to the Indulging my inner crazy blog post when I wrote it in July. Going for a walk in the pouring rain in the summer when it’s relatively warm is one thing. Going for a walk in the pouring rain at the end of October is definitely taking it to the next level!

Walk, Derbyshire, walking, hiking, walking for wellbeing, wellbeing, mental health, rain, rainy day, weather, friends, Belper, aromatherapy, massage, health, dogs, dog walking — Me, Lucy and Laura

What you need, is friends like these, with dogs like these, who are all as crazy as you. I even offered them a way out by inviting them to lunch at my house instead but it was decided to head out to the Peaks regardless. And I’m so pleased we did. Even on the dullest of days, Mam Tor offers breathtaking views.

The walk was originally intended to be a 3 mile circular route that would take us just over an hour. We got carried away chatting and it ended up closer to 6 miles and took nearly 3 hours. We traversed bogs, rocky paths and helped each other down muddy, slippery, steep slopes. I wasn’t the only one to fall over!

By the time we got back to the car park we’d all discovered what it really means to have waterproof clothing, as oppose to showerproof. Thankfully, most of us had taken a change of clothes and we piled our wet stuff in the car boot and headed off to the pub for much deserved refreshments. Low and behold, by the time we’d eaten, drunk and most importantly dried off/warmed up, by the time we left the pub, the sun was shining.

It was an experience I won’t forget and would definitely repeat, with great friends who are just as bonkers as I am 🤪🥰.

Uncategorized

A Tea Tree in Sheffield

September 19, 2019 besspurser

I had a wander around the Winter Gardens in Sheffield the other day, a stunning feat of architecture with huge timber beams soaring cathedral-like towards the heavens.

Inside is housed a collection of plants often found in temperate climates and sections devoted to Australasia, including a tea tree. I don’t think I’ve ever seen one in the flesh before so I was delighted!

Tea Tree is one of the most commonly used essential oils as it has great antibacterial, anti-infectious and anti-fungal properties, to name just a few. It appears in many different products from skin cleansers to natural toilet cleaners. According to Tisserand, it is also an emotional tonic for lethargy, anxiety and depression. It is often known as the bottle brush tree due to the formation of the needles, as you can see below.

There were also some great examples of New Zealand’s Norfolk Island Pines, which have been around since the Jurassic period.

As far as I’m aware, these pines aren’t used in aromatherapy. I dare say they are used medicinally in some way in their native home though. Other plants I found that are harvested for their healing properties were eucalyptus, aloes, jasmine and the olive pictured above.

A selection of Aloes

Jasmine essential oil, essential oils, massage, aromatherapy, Sheffield, winter gardens, Belper, Derbyshire — Jasmine, it caught my nose before it caught my eye!

There was also some beautiful colours dotted around, although I don’t know the name of those plants as there’s no essential oils produced from them! The Winter Gardens are well worth a visit, I’ll definitely be hanging around in there again soon.