Good morning everybody, I wanted to share with you today what’s been going on with me with feeling the collective fear. And how I’ve been dealing with that in the hopes that some of the tips and tricks I share with you, you’ll be able to use as well. So that you can overcome this collective fear and move through this time of pandemic with a bit more clarity, a bit more focus and a bit more love.
On Wednesday before I’d done the last video (on my facebook page) , a call went out from my ward at Chesterfield hospital to ask if any staff could go in that day as they were short. I called the ward and offered to go in for the afternoon. Instantly I felt the tension rise in my body because I’d got XYZ I needed to do before going to the hospital and I had to organise child care etc. At that point I felt anxiety, tension building up in my body. A few minutes later I found out that they didn’t need anyone anymore as someone else had already stepped up. Thank you to whoever it was who stepped up.
That feeling of tension and fear didn’t really go away. As I was out in the woods foraging for wild garlic, I had to stop and take a breath as I could feel a knot in my stomach/diaphragm, it felt like I couldn’t get my breath in properly, I couldn’t fully expand my lungs so that I could breathe. It felt like stress, fear and tension. I took a moment to stop and take a few deep breaths in the wood, envisioned I was breathing in the goodness of the woodland, the scent of the pine leaves, the damp soil, the rain. Breathing in all this goodness from the earth’s energy and breathing out all this anxiety. I felt it come up through my diaphragm and out through my mouth, returning it to the universe, sending it with love. I knew that it wasn’t my fear.
I often pick up on the anxiety of those closest to me and sometimes I know that the anxiety is mine, it’s not to do with anyone else but on Wednesday I knew that this was not my anxiety. It was the anxiety of those closest to me, but it was it was the anxiety of the rest of society that has grown as the pandemic has spread. I asked myself if I could hold it, to lessen the burden for others that were feeling this fear, but I couldn’t. I need to be strong in order to put myself in a vulnerable position with my work at the hospital to care for those who need it most.
I felt a bit better after I’d done the breaths in the woodlands but it didn’t really conquer it, it didn’t go away completely. Throughout the rest of the day, I felt cold, hungry but didn’t know what to eat, I didn’t want to eat, which is a sure sign of stress for me I couldn’t engage my brain, I couldn’t settle to do anything. I’d made a right mess in my kitchen making the sauerkraut with the wild garlic but I couldn’t be bothered to tidy up.
I carried on doing the deep breathing, I got out my essential oil blend that I take to the hospital and rubbed a few drops over my solar plexus, as I do everyday when I start at the hospital, that instantly made me feel better. I ate nourishing food (which makes me feel strong)and avoided comfort food as that makes me feel stodgy. I had an Epsom salts bath, with added essential oils for relaxation, ensuring my solar plexus was covered by the water.
I know that other people count their breathing, so inhale for a count of 4, hold it for 4, exhale for 4, or vary the count or try to lengthen it. Today I might walk barefoot on the grass to keep me connected to the grounding, supporting earth energy. I’ll probably get my crystals out too, to help my chakras stay in balance. This fear is very much base chakra and I’ll keep my solar plexus protected. Doing the video helps my voice (throat chakra) with breathing and mindfulness helping to balance out all my chakras.
I’m not afraid of this virus. I know that I’m in a fortunate position because I’m healthy and fit. if I let the fear in, I let the virus in too. I feel the fear, acknowledge it, i recognise what it is and then let it through my body. Essential oils, breathing, crystals, whatever it is you need to do to look after yourself. Let me know if you have more suggestions of what is helping you.
The other important thing is gratitude. I am grateful that I have a job at the hospital because it pays my bills, it gives me opportunities to work extra hours for extra money to buy nice things. I am grateful that I have a wonderful family around me who can help with childcare and I can help them too. I’m grateful that I’ve got my own treatment room, my own house and a car that can get me places. Keeping gratitude as a practice is really helpful too.
I’m looking forward to the day when we all feel safe again. See you soon.